


Breakup

by Ninmerin



Series: Twists and Turns of Fade [3]
Category: Dragon Age Inquisition - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Both POVs, Breakup, F/M, Oneshot, SPOILERS!!!, THAT SCENE, mostly canon, there will be tears
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-10
Updated: 2017-04-10
Packaged: 2018-10-17 08:33:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10590303
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ninmerin/pseuds/Ninmerin
Summary: The breakup scene in Crestwood. Mostly canon. Oneshot as part of my existing series.





	

"The veil is thin here," Solas said as he walked with her through the cave, into the clearing at the back. The sky was visible here, the stars twinkling around the full moon.

A small waterfall at the back of the cave trickled water, reflecting the moon's light on the walls.

"It's good that we came," Arianni said. "I need to tell you something, Solas."

"Please, let me speak first," Solas said, and she nodded.

"I was trying to think of a way to show you what you mean to me."

"You don't have to do that. I know what we mean to each other," Arianni said, smiling.

"Even so..." Solas gazed at her as he touched her cheek. "For now, the best gift I can offer is... the truth. You are unique. In all of Thedas, I never expected to find someone who could draw my attention from the Fade. You have become important to me. More important than I could have imagined." His voice was breathless as he spoke.

Arianni felt her ears burning. He always made her so flustered when he looked at her like this. And the things he was saying. She could feel her heart pounding. She placed her hand to his, holding it to her face.

"You are more important to me than I can put into words, Solas," She said softly.

"Then, what I must tell you... The truth..." Solas opened his mouth to speak, looking at her eyes, her face, before pulling away from her. "Your face," He said, his voice no longer breathless. "The Vallaslin. In my journeys in the Fade, I have seen things. I have discovered what those marks mean."

Arianni stared at him in confusion. What could her Vallaslin have to do with any of this?

"They honor the Elven gods," She replied.

"No," Solas said. "They are slave markings. Or at least, they were in the time of ancient Arlathan."

 _What?_  
"So, this is... what? Just one more thing the Dalish got wrong?" Arianni wrung her hands, and Solas took them in his. He could see the frustration, the panic building. The simple gesture helped her remind herself of where she was.    
  
"I'm sorry," he said softly.   
  
"We try to preserve our culture, and this is what we keep?" Arianni laughed bitterly. "Relics of a time when we were no better than Tevinter."  
  
Solas squeezed her hands gently. "Don't say that. For all the Dalish got wrong, they did one thing right. They made you."   
  
"I didn't tell you this to hurt you," Solas said. "If you like, I know a spell... I can remove the Vallaslin."   
  
"If this is true..." Arianni hesitated.   
  
"It is," Solas said.   
  
"We are the last of the Elvhenan, and never again shall we submit," Arianni said, reciting the vow of her people.   
  
"I'm so sorry for causing you pain," Solas said softly. "It was selfish of me. I look at you, and I see what you truly are. How unique you are, how strong... You deserve better than what those cruel marks represent."   
  
"Take them away," Arianni said.   
  
Solas led her to a large rock with a flat surface. "Sit," He said gently.   
  
She did, closing her eyes. Solas passed his hand over her face, a blue light emanating from it.   
  
"Ar lasa mala revas. You are free," Solas said, taking her hands and helping her stand.   
  
Arianni touched her face, uncertain. _They are gone_  
  
Solas smiled at her. "You are so beautiful," He said, kissing her cheek.   
  
She smiled, turning her face to his and kissing him in earnest.   
  
After a moment, Solas pulled back, looking at her with a smile.  
  
"Thank you," Arianni said.   
  
Without warning, he frowned, and a look of sadness came upon his face.   
  
"I am sorry," he said. "I have distracted you from your duty. It will never happen again."   
  
He pulled away from her then.   
  
"Solas..." Arianni reached for him, her voice pleading. He couldn't be serious. Not now, not after everything. 

Solas stepped back, pulling his hands away from her. "Please, vhenan." He folded his hands together.

"Solas, please don't leave me. Not now. I love you." Arianni put her arms around herself. "Ir lath, ma vhenan," she said quietly.

Solas closed his eyes, his expression unreadable. "Whatever happens, know that you are a rare and marvelous spirit." Solas turned away. "In another world, maybe."

"Why not this one?" Arianni demanded. That he wouldn't even LOOK at her was maddening.

"I can't," Solas said simply, then, almost as an afterthought, "I'm sorry."

Arianni shook her head. "I won't give up on you." Whatever you need, whatever is missing, we can find it together." She didn't understand how he could be so callous, how he could say such painful things without any emotion.

"No, we can't." Solas sighed. "You'll see."

Arianni was angry now. "Say that you don't care." She needed to hear it from him. Needed to hear that it was all a lie.

"I can't." Solas didn't move.

"Tell me I was just some casual dalliance so I can call you a son of a bitch and move on!" Arianni was shouting now, every word thrown at Solas's back with all of her pain and rage.

Solas didn't answer, and Arianni felt the tears now, as hard as she had tried to hold them back. They burned their way down her cheeks.   
  
"I'm sorry. I should have ended this long before. I never wanted to hurt you."  
  
"Banal'abelas, banal'vhenan!" Arianni shouted the words at him, with all the rage she could muster.   
  
She was rewarded with the sight of him flinching at the words, though he didn't move, didn't turn to her.   
  
"How can you do this to me?" Her voice was a whisper now. She couldn't shout anymore. She knew her voice would break. She wouldn't break, not here, not in front of him.

She wasn't sure what she wanted more, for him to turn to her and comfort her, telling her he was sorry, that he didn't mean it, or to grab him, shake him, MAKE him look at her, MAKE him give her a reason. That he stood before her, sounding almost bored as he left her, just added to her grief.

"I will see you back at Skyhold," Solas murmured, leaving the cave. She was almost relieved as he left. Dropping to her knees, she let the tears flow freely. 

\------------------------------------------  
Solas POV  
\------------------------------------------

  
"Solas..." Her voice was pleading as she reached for him.

Solas stepped back, pulling his hands away from her. "Please, vhenan." He couldn't bear her touch. Couldn't take the tenderness with which she reached for him, nor the kindness still in her eyes as she looked at him.

"Solas, please don't leave me. Not now. I love you." Arianni put her arms around herself. "Ir lath, ma vhenan," she said quietly.

Solas looked into the eyes of his beloved, now filled with sadness and pain. Her green eyes, so vibrant and expressive, were filled with unshed tears. He closed his eyes.  
He couldn't bear it. For her to tell him she loved him while she was so hurt, at his hands. It was too much.

"Whatever happens, know that you are a rare and marvelous spirit." Solas turned away. "In another world, maybe."

"Why not this one?" Arianni demanded.

"I can't. I'm sorry."

"I won't give up on you." Her voice was determined. She was bargaining now, unable to accept this. "Whatever you need, whatever is missing, we can find it together."

How he wished that were true.  
"No, we can't." Solas sighed. "You'll see."

"Say that you don't care," she said, her voice angry.

"I can't."

"Tell me I was just some casual dalliance so I can call you a son of a bitch and move on!" Arianni was shouting now, and every word pierced his heart.  
  
"I'm sorry. I should have ended this long before. I never wanted to hurt you." He couldn't say more, couldn't turn to face her, or he risked his resolve breaking.   
  
"Banal'abelas, banal'vhenan!"  
  
The words hurt, stabbing into his core. He flinched away from them.

"How can you do this to me?" Her voice was a whisper now, defeated.

Oh how he wanted to turn to her, take her into his arms and comfort her. He knew exactly the look on her face, he could picture it as clearly as if he were facing her. He had studied her face so often, watching her as she slept near him. Sketching her on scrap parchment in the rotunda. He knew her features well, and knew how she would look right now.The pain and confusion in her eyes, the pout of her lower lip as she fought back tears.

"I will see you back at Skyhold," Solas murmured, leaving the cave. He couldn't stay. If he stayed he was sure his heart would break. He heard her sob as he left, knew that every tear she cried was his fault. He should never have allowed himself to believe he could have happiness, and certainly not happiness with her.

He ran, then. Away from Skyhold, away from the cave, away from his heart. He poured magic into his speed, willing himself as far away as he could bear. When he finally stopped running, his legs gave out from beneath him, and he clung to a tree for support, his chest heaving. Wiping his face, he gasped as he felt tears on his cheeks. Solas slid to the ground, choking on a sob.  
  
He hadn't known he could still feel such pain. He hadn't known he could still cry, he had assumed all of the tears were left behind when he awoke. Solas wrapped his arms around himself and sobbed, a wounded animal, wailing his pain for all the forest to hear.

"Ir abelas," he whimpered, "Ir abelas, ma vhenan."

He knew if she came upon him now, he would break. He would spill all of his emotions, his secrets, everything he was too scared to tell her before. He knew he would be willing to take any pain, any punishment, if only to heal her. He would give up everything for the chance to see her smile.  
  
Her smile. He could picture it now, coy, amused. Her green eyes shining as he showed her a new area of the Fade. Her delight at meeting a new spirit, making a new friend. He could hear her laugh, like an echo, faded and yet clear. As he pictured her face, it twisted before him, grief-stricken and tear stained. He felt as though a knife twisted in his gut, and pressed a hand to his mouth as he sobbed.

He'd broken her, his heart, and in doing so shattered his own. The pain was more than he could bear, and he screamed at the sky, until his throat burned nearly as much as his heart. He howled at the scarred heavens, an animalistic sound.  
  
He called her name, begged her to come to him, to find him and embrace him, to forgive him.

"Vhenan, Ir abelas!" He cried, pressing his forehead to the ground, feeling the beginnings of rain pelt the back of his head and neck.  
He knew she wouldn't hear him. He had run so far from her. From his heart, his only love.

"Ir lath, ma vhenan," Solas keened as he leaned against the tree, curled in on himself while tears and rain cascaded down his face in equal measure.

**Author's Note:**

> As always:
> 
> -Please be gentle with criticism  
> -Please tell me what you think/any suggestions you have  
> -Please remember that this work is still under construction.
> 
> and, most importantly, Thank you for reading my fic. <3


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